Aannsha’s Blog #53 – Losing our footage

Waves on rocks

Before I let you know about our little video footage mishap, let me add my comments to Barry’s account of the day and night Baz decided to test our boat and Mantus anchor in winds blowing steady at 25 to 30 knots and gusting up to 45 knots. Yes it was Barry’s decision to do this, and yes, I totally understand why he wanted to do it. If we’re going to spend a lot of our time at anchor once we start sailing again, we want to know what our anchor can stand, how our yacht A B Sea holds up, and how we deal with strong winds.

But while I knew it was a wise thing to do given we were in a relatively safe environment with the option of Plan B should things get too hairy, uncomfy or unsafe, I honestly didn’t want to be there on the boat experiencing it. Plan B by the way, was calling Mike and the marineros to come and assist us into the marina to tie up to a dock. So why didn’t I just leave Barry to his own devices and take the dinghy to a friend’s boat and sit it out with them?

Well, (1) I am generally up for a challenge and like to test the limits of my own capabilities and inner nerve even if I don’t like the circumstances, and (2) I wasn’t going to let my husband experience this on his own in our floating home that contains all of our worldly possessions. It’s not that I didn’t trust Baz to cope on his own; of course he could and given I only had one usable hand at the time, I wasn’t much assistance anyway. It’s just that I couldn’t in my heart, leave him on his own. It wouldn’t be right. And as much as I really was not comfy with the situation for a lot of the time and I genuinely detested the experience for the last few hours, there was no way I would have left Baz by himself.

View from anchor in the bay by Kas marina

The anchorage near Kaş marina is relatively well protected in a pleasant bay and most of the time we’d been there we’d experienced just slight breezes and only gently rippling clear blue water. However, as forecast on Windy and Predict Wind, the wind strength increased steadily throughout the day and we found ourselves sitting in A B Sea as she pirouetted around the anchor like a ballerina on steroids. The reason for this is that the surrounding hills affect the wind flow and the air circulated and buffeted our boat from first one way, then the direct opposite. Working down below on the laptop wasn’t too bad if I didn’t look out of the side hatches at the world spinning.

Because of the constant movement around the Mantus, A B Sea’s anchor came unstuck and dragged until we were too close to the edge of the bay and little boats for comfort. We upped the anchor, moved position and dropped anchor again, where it held firmly. Then we hunkered down to sit it out some more.

The worst of it came in the evening after dark – doesn’t it always?

The 45 knot wind gusts started to come in hard and fast and along with sending A B Sea spinning this way and that, the gusts increased in strength to the point where our yacht was blown at an angle, heeling on her side as she turned. It was obvious to me that this was only going to get worse, or at the very least remain the same for hours – Windy had predicted it. I sat down below gritting my teeth, staring grimly up at Baz who was now standing in the companionway stairs watching and waiting, taking in A B Sea’s reactions to the situation.

I caught myself staring angrily up at him, with my teeth clenched, annoyed that he had to do this test; that I had to be in this situation, all the time wanting it to end. Oh for God’s sake Baz, how much more do we need to experience?!! I thought as I blazed a hole in his knees that were at my eye level. I wasn’t game to say anything though. I knew it wouldn’t make a difference. He’d just stoically stand there, and tell me I was being too anxious or something. I was anxious. I was unhappy. And I was really ready to call the experiment. But my husband is the captain and it wasn’t my call. So I had to sit there and manage my tension. (Mindfulness did help by the way, it stopped me from flailing around the decks screaming for help - but it still didn’t get me to a place of being so much ‘at one’ with my situation that I was okay with it).

My main anxiety didn’t come from thinking the boat would break or that the anchor chain would snap, or that we’d heel over so far we’d overturn.